Either way, we here at CollegeCandy have started having our suspicions about her — from her overhyped birth to the expulsion of other families from the NICU, we can’t help but wonder…are these signs that is Blue Ivy a tiny, very talented Damien? Check out the gallery to see my reasons why!
5. Performing other acts of evil
Blocking parents from the NICU for security, potentially smuggling in a surrogate, and generally being holier-than-thou about the whole pregnancy have created a series of "well that's kind of mean and unnecessary" comments on all Babyonce posts. While right now everything is on her parents, I'm terrified for Blue Ivy's evil future.
4. Performing counterfeit miracles
That is, pretending to perform miracles, but really just letting luck, or money, take over things. This is probably the place where I would mention the fake surrogate and Beyonce's "back and better than ever" body that will be in the tabloids within a few months. I'll just let you read between the lines.
3. Arrogance
Basically, the "I'm better than you" vibe is playing hard through all these signs. When it comes to this, arrogance of the "I'm not just better than you, I'm going to rule over you and destroy the world" variety is present. I'm officially terrified of a baby.
2. Opposes those who are worshipped
We all know that Blue Ivy is going to rebel hardcore against her parents - the creme de la creme of the music industry - but she's probably going to try to overthrow the government too. Y'all watch yourselves
1. Sitting In the Temple
In Biblical language, this is a way of saying "Living in a palace and lording over us." Which, let's just say, Blue Ivy's mom and pop are more guilty of this than her (I mean, she is only a few days old), but what's she gonna learn, huh? She's better than all those other NICU babies? Um, yeah, actually.
