Friday, March 6, 2015
Science says that charisma can be learned — here are 9 proven strategies
It's not something you're born with.
"Charisma is simply the result of learned behaviors," says Olivia Fox Cobane, author of "The Charisma Myth."
Use words that people can relate to.
In his book "Why Presidents Succeed," University of California at Davis psychologist Dean Keith Simonton argues that the most effective communicators use concrete — rather than abstract — language.
"'I feel your pain' has association," he tells the APA Monitor, "but 'I can relate to your viewpoint' doesn't. The most charismatic presidents reached an emotional connection with people talking not to their brains but to their gut."
Express your feelings.
"Charismatic individuals express their feelings spontaneously and genuinely," Claremont McKenna College psychologist Ronald E. Riggio says. "This allows them to affect the moods and emotions of others."
It's called emotional contagion, or "the tendency to automatically mimic and synchronize expressions."
So if you're really excited about something, other people with "catch" that excitement, too.
Talk about your potential — it's more impressive than talking about your accomplishments.
A Stanford-Harvard study recently cited on Marginal Revolution suggests that accomplishments aren't what capture people's attention — rather, it's a person's perceived potential.
"This uncertainty [that comes with potential] appears to be more cognitively engaging than reflecting on what is already known to be true," the authors write.
Mirror the person you're speaking to.
Psychologists have found that when two people are getting along, they start to mirror each other's bodies as a sign of trust and safety. Your date crosses their legs, so do you; you take a sip of water, so does your date.
If you want to do better in a negotiation, the research says to mimic your opponent's behavior.
Walk the same rate as other people — they'll think you're friendly.
In a Durham University study, students were shown video clips of 26 other students walking — some with looser gaits, some tighter.
Just a few steps were needed to give a sense of personality. Students equated looser gaits with extroversion and adventurousness, while the more clipped walkers were seen as neurotic.
A University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign study on walking speeds showed that guys match women's walking paces if they're attracted to them.
Keep your hands and torso open to signal that you're welcoming.
Keeping your hands stuffed in your pockets and your shoulders turned inward sends the signal that you're not interested. But talking with your hands and standing in an open stance shows that you're available.
Bring a dog with you, since it makes you look nurturing.
In a University of Michigan experiment, women read vignettes about men. Whenever the story featured a person who owned a dog, women rated them with higher long-term attractiveness.
The researchers concluded that owning a pet signaled that you're nurturing and capable of making long-term commitments. It also makes you appear more relaxed, approachable, and happy.
Smile more.
In two experiments, researchers in Switzerland examined the relationship between attractiveness and smiling.
They found that the stronger the smile, the more attractive a face looked.
In fact, a happy facial expression compensated for relative unattractiveness.
Get people to talk about themselves.
According to Harvard research, talking about yourself stimulates the same brain regions as sex or a good meal.
"Activation of this system when discussing the self suggests that self-disclosure ... may be inherently pleasurable," Scientific American reports.
And when people talk about their experiences, they become more vulnerable to one another, and when they become more vulnerable to one another, they form social bonds and coinvest in one another's welfare.
Actor Harrison Ford plane survives plane crash in LA
He's not just a hero in his action films, he's one in real life. Actor Harrison Ford, 72, saved his life and that of others yesterday. He was flying a small vintage plane in Venice, California on Thursday afternoon when the engine failed. He managed to fly to plane to Penmar golf course and made a crash landing there to avoid human casualty. He was the only person in the plane at the time of the crash.
The experienced pilot, who has been flying since the 60s, sustained head wounds and bled profusely. He was transported to the UCLA trauma centre where he's currently receiving treatment for injuries he sustained from the crash. His son, Ben Ford later tweeted to fans to assure them that his dad is ok
Harrison flying same plane that crashed yesterday, last month.
The experienced pilot, who has been flying since the 60s, sustained head wounds and bled profusely. He was transported to the UCLA trauma centre where he's currently receiving treatment for injuries he sustained from the crash. His son, Ben Ford later tweeted to fans to assure them that his dad is ok
"At the hospital. Dad is ok. Battered, but ok! He is every bit the man you would think he is. He is an incredibly strong man.'The fact that he escaped the crash with just a few injuries is not surprising to those who have flown with him. They say he's a great pilot. See photos from the crash after the cut..
Harrison flying same plane that crashed yesterday, last month.
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Quotables: Unngh, Despicable Chris
"Whatever decision my man wants to make, I’m gonna rock with him. I’m not gonna fight any of his battles. But what decision you make…We see eye to eye on a lot of things. I just tell him, Hey, man, if you was dating some regular chick you wouldn’t be talked about."
--Chris Brown speaking out on Tyga's "alleged" relationship with Kylie Jenner, which just gets more and more awful as more folks talk about it.
Honestly, we're not surprised that somebody as heinous as Chris Brown is totally OK with a 25-year-old man dating a 17-year-old girl who's probably confused as hell about life (because what 17-year-old knows it all, let alone someone with an accelerated upbringing ... like a Jenner). It makes sense, though, because Chris Brown and his actions are questionable at best.
And speaking of Rihanna, he said this about his most famous ex, too, which really leads you to be concerned about his state of being:
"We just cordial. I respect her space. She respects mine. It’s not too much talking, [because then] it gets to, 'Hey, we gonna hang out?' It’s just complicated."
"Complicated," right. Let's lay it down for you, Chris -- you don't harangue women into hanging out with you after you've punched out their lights, and you don't date and corrupt underage kids. How about that? Is that simple enough for you, brah?
Giuliana Rancic Looks ... Better
That's Giuliana Rancic on the left at this year's Grammys, and also, Giuliana Rancic on the right at last night's Academy Awards. Both photos showcase a really, really thin Giuliana, but the getup -- and pose -- on the right seems to be a little less concerning and a bit more flattering.
You heard earlier in the morning that even stars like Naomi Watts "starve" themselves before awards shows, and while we're not insinuating that Giuliana is guilty of that particular practice, we are saying that we sure hope she isn't ... because there isn't all that much to lose there.
Awards season is nearly over ... everybody can just relax now, right?
Read more: http://www.fishwrapper.com/#ixzz3Se7B7GNf
Follow us: @fishwrapped on Twitter
DAMON WAYANS GROUNDED BY DIABETES ... Tour Dates Cancelled
Damon Wayans is postponing multiple tour stops after suffering a medical emergency related to his diabetes ... TMZ has learned.
The comedian was supposed to perform Saturday in Missouri, but sources close to Wayans tell us he's unable to fly right now because of his ongoing battle with Type 2 diabetes. He was diagnosed back in 2013.
The Kansas City Improv Theater says it got word Tuesday Damon wouldn't be able to perform -- and our sources say there are going to be more cancellations down the road. He's already dropped a six-show engagement in Buffalo next month.
We're told Damon will attempt to do shows if they're close enough for him to drive from L.A. -- but until his health improves all out-of-state gigs are on hold.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)